My name is Aliona. Many of you know, in 5-7 years I would like to create an orphanage, or something like a house for single teen mothers, or a "Hope Meadows" meets "ReTribe CLP" type community with lots of children who for whatever reason lack hugs in their lives. Yes, simple safe hugs, long hugs, hugs that are wholesome and pure, gifted with care, with consideration, with respect. I'd like to create a place like that so that we can gift sacred hugs, "sacred" meaning - they must carry both the aspect of relationship/love/care/compassion/kindness and the aspect of safety/trust/reassuredness of the purity of our intention, and we need to be sure we are striving to be the best versions of ourselves.

In order to fulfill that last part, I would like to better myself continuously, and I need support with that. That support is in my living within a community of people who also want to better themselves. And we support each other as we all learn - together - a more relational way of living. I would love to invite all of us to strive to become better! Imagine the world we would live in then! And until everyone awakens and begins striving towards that "better" self, let us begin with those of us who already know that being in community can be challenging in the beginning and can be superbly rewarding, because we could meet our needs for connection, for platonic affection, for deep relationships, for belonging, and - for the successes of navigating frictions and challenges and boundaries in a healthy way.

That is what I am striving for - a community around me (literally, so I don't have to go far to meet them - not further than my kitchen, actually) of people who I can deliberately learn to trust and bond with, and learn and practice resolving real conflicts with in a skillful way, and have shared experiences outside the house too - not because we were forced into something, but because we live with people who share our interests and so we are excited to share nature, or apple picking, or music concerts, or travels together.

So, here is me - inviting people, who are interested to either participate in Relational Group Practices, or in addition to that - actually live in a house and share a kitchen, to fill out our Interest Form. Let's start figuring out who we all are, who want to live together and learn and do practices that connect us humans.

We will likely end up renting one for an initial group of people, meanwhile feeling open as well to the possibility of buying a house collectively - so that we create more equity by living here, rather than paying rent.

So, we would each be making 2 commitments: I will pay my rent (if we are renting) - that is Financial, and I will show up regularly - that is Relational. The goal is that at some point the benefits we each reap from the community, and the belonging we each feel, outweigh the costs and any contributions that we make. We are functioning as a cooperative - that is, every member has an equal vote - independent of the amount of equity they have. And again, the equity being built is both Financial and Relational.

We all have different timelines. As of this writing (5 Sept 2024), there are a few of you that are committed and/or interested. But what does that actually look like? Some are thinking you could come up for a month in winter, or for a weekend, or available in March, or available to move any time, or just wanting this to be a distance thing. Here is what I propose - there is a section about "communal living situation". If you are serious about the "living together" part for any duration of time, I invite you to complete that section to your ability and desire. Better clarity for us about your situation means that we can accommodate your specific circumstances better too. And if interested in building equity over a longer stay - through some sort of co-buying, as opposed to just renting short-term or in the near future - share your ability to be on the mortgage with a bank or your ability to be the initial owner who has the funds to buy out the house and be the "bank/owner" of our house, so to speak. Or anything else you can think of. We want to be aware everyone's needs and understand what we each are looking for.

Imagine that every month we choose a topic. Let's say it is November, and we chose Loneliness. Now, for that whole month we will explore this concept in many different ways. Solo-intellectual can look like journaling, pondering specific questions like what it is, what it is not, writing poetry and songs about it. Group-intellectual can look like sharing in group - from our journals or otherwise, and discussing, bouncing off of each other's ideas. Experiential can look like embodiment practices, exploring the shapes our bodies want to take when flooded by loneliness, creating rituals to honor it, etc. Many possibilities there. And living that every day for a month, looking into nearly every experience through the lense of curiosity about this topic... This is what I've experienced to some degree at PARAcards/PARAlabs sessions with Ben and Leslie, and they have graciously opened the container to share it with the world. And they, apparently, really lived these topics. So can we. And they shared they've learnt a ton, and so can we. I'd love to do something like this. If this possibility excites you - connect with us, let us know, and we'll find ways to do this together. Intent is the building block of the outcome.

Week-long (or a few days long) residences could look like intensives, where a bunch of us live for that time in pretty close proximity - say, a living room. Not a lot of privacy, not a lot of space - the result will be more friction, and that means more opportunities to practice ERI. Jay Digges has a book "Conflict = Energy" and this would be a great opportunity to dive real-time into the practices in it. Imagine the growth, the learnings, the potential!

HERI = Home for Emotional and Relational Intelligence
ERI = Emotional and Relational Intelligence
PARA = Personal And Relational Awareness